S2 E4: the real birthday

It’s come up a few times in this project but its inception wasn’t exactly as open and honest as it appeared. I did in fact start the weekly check-ins as a method of accountability because I had found myself in a real shit place in life, but i wasn’t being truthful. The first three entries were either exaggerating the good parts or simply all out bullshit. Whether i was trying to convince myself or someone else is still up for debate, it hard to say. But this was the real breaking point. This was when the bending and bending and bending finally snapped. This was the ultimate low point that would end up being dual purposed as the starting point for the life I’m living now. This was a rebirth. And for such an important and pivotal day in my short history, it’s kinda been surrounded by a sense of melancholy. Maybe it’s the snow or bad sleep, but looking at all of the work that has come and gone in a year and understanding how much there is still to go is daunting…kinda scary…and creates this air of funk.

Anyways, that was a hell of a ramble to say that the road goes on forever and the party never ends. Last week was a solid one, filled with a bunch of fitness and longtime overdue housework that kept the days flying by. It’s always a good time when you’re doing the right thing by yourself and others and it’s not difficult. Making the right thing into a routine is an insanely sick power move that I’d never even dream of last year. The trajectory is promising for fuckin sure. We mixed in some fun too, dinner out at the seafood boil spot, a matinee movie date (Nosferatu was fucking creepy…like “what the fuck did I just watch” creepy), and even people watching at dance halls. On paper it looks like I’m all over the place but it’s really been the Scott/Nutt greatest hits show before she leaves on the big trip.

The supplement store is running a body composition challenge in February that helped kick start me last year so I’m looking forward to diving in to that, there’s two BJJ competitions i want to do in February and we culminate that month with my first ever trip to New York. This year is shaping up to be eventful and exciting, if we can ever get through the end of fucking January my god. Pretty soon I’ll be in a new career making something of myself but starting from the bottom with no preconceived notions or shoes to fill. Life is getting good when you sit down and look at it.

As far as the way life hasn’t exactly gone the way I thought it would these last few years…I try not to think about what might have been. Cuz that was then, and I’ve taken a different road. With the faith that I do have, it’s imperative i put it into the idea that this is the way it was determined to play out and make the absolute best of it that I can. Hell, maybe this is the part right before Carmi finds the money in the tomatoes…and i just bought a new can opener. Until next week, stay fresh cheese bags ✌️ 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

S2 Bonus: ACL recovery

Image
It’s funny how this whole blog project started as an accountability thread for getting back in shape, which then mutated into a weekly log of my mental health recovery journey. Ups, downs, victories, and set backs run through this last year and a half and it leads to the understanding i can withstand just about anything. Then i tore my ACL. Now im stuck on the couch and my house will be a revolving door of family and friends helping me out over the next few weeks. All of that said, the first couple of days are gonna be intriguing to say the least so i figured I’d start this thread as a day by day check-in. It won’t be separate posts for each day, just additions to this entry so check back! Day 0: surgery and hell I was up at 4 for a 5:30am check-in time. Put on my cleanest cut-off shorts and lifting shirt and was ready to fuck this thing. I only really started panicking once they made me change and hooked me up to all the shit…but by then it’s like when they lock the rollercoaster bar ...
Read more

S2 E21: the end and beginning

Image
 Welp, it happened. Whole ass officially happened. Last Friday I took my uniform off for the the last time, snagged some stickers and a flag on the way out, and medically retired from the United States Army. Yeah, the target since fall semester of 2009 and the job that has defined my identity has all come to an end. Lemme pull this side thread for a minute because tackling how I’m feeling in its entirety is seemingly impossible right now. So Friday i pierced my nose, rather I went to my tattoo shop and paid a professional to stab me in the nostril and fill the hole with a cute little shiny stud. Coming from a blood line with already big noses, the swelling I’ve had since Friday makes me feel like inoki from Shippuden which is just excessive. Can’t wait for the next six months to fly by so i can swap out the stud for a ring but in the meantime its all saline solution and not laying on my face. It’s hard to put into words how im feeling. On the one hand this event has been on the hor...
Read more

S2 E52: Respite

Image
 Damn, alright folks shake it out and off and away. What a fuckin year huh? Sorry it’s been a few weeks, it’s been pretty rough and tumble the back half of December to cap off an already chaotic year. Let’s get in to it. So the last entry dropped a week out from NYE. Christmas Eve i worked with my buddy then went home and spent some quality time with the dogs. Christmas Day was spent being disappointed in stranger things volume 2 and playing Xbox all day. The last week was just slugging through it at work before taking off for NYE in Ohio. Nothing much to talk about, just lifting and rolling and eating. After i realized i was doing the inbody scan every other day and letting the numbers hurt my feelings, i stopped fucking doing that 🤣. Be real with yourself about expectations and realities kids. The conundrum of my diet persists and so do I. Ohio was awesome, as always. We hit the Cinci zoo for the lights festival (Kyle, Kris, an absolute pleasure as always). Gotta pay respects to...
Read more