S2 E31-32: even more recovery

 So yeah last week i could not possibly be bothered to write a post before it was too late in the week and then i just kinda figured “they can’t be mad at me, im injured.” Terrible excuse i know, but more so i just hate posting an entry on Thursday and then immediately post the next one 3-4 days later. Sooooooo yeah, another combination post. It’s alright, maybe after this I check the amount of combined posts from last season and attempt to do less this season.

Two weeks ago was pretty chill. Nick flew in on Monday and we very much just chilled all week. Mobility was a little bit better at that point but not substantially so, plus Nick’s idea of a good time is doing Jack shit so that’s what we did. Went to dinner with some of his friends on Wednesday and they paid for me which was super nice of them, must be nice to have the coin of that capacity (Jesus Christ i need a job). What was a substantial addition to the routine was the incorporation of Mario Party in the mix. Now every other night I’m receiving a text like “waaaah (in extreme waluigi voice).” Pt was pt, had a magic night that Sunday and got put in my place…just a standard week. OH, and I learned how to crochet by making a wooble. That was fun as hell and addicting…it will now become a thing I’m doing on the side. I mean look at Fred, he cute as fuck (not finished, hes missing his arms and spikes but its a work in progress)

Last week was my first week solo dolo and the first true test of “do the right thing even when nobody is looking.” Not in a behavior or criminal capacity, but keeping myself accountable with the PT workouts and using walking assistance (crutches, walker, etc). It’s tough, i really wanted to just walk around and not do the pt because it’s boring and easy. I’ve got to be honest, i wasn’t the best at doing ALL of my pt. I did most of it but as the week went on we went from the five a day to four, three, Sunday i only did it once. I’m sorry! I know it’s not the best. But hey, i was given some different exercises this morning so I’m going back to keeping accountability and doing all of my PT. Oh shit also I finished a Gundam model last week…that was fun. Like Lego but way more intense

My friends and I have lived a lot of life. It’s a crazy conclusion to come through when you realize it. Liz and I have lived in four different houses, I’ve been to like 10 countries (mostly for the army), deployed twice, have been medically retired from the army, and am now studying for law school to eventually have a completely new career. And I’m only 33. Time sure does fly and we’ve done a shit ton in that time. There’s no deeper thought or message to that conclusion…just kinda an aside.

I’m gonna be depressingly honest right now, i am not comfortable in my current existence. Not sure what it is: could be the limitations of the injury and recovery, could be the failing job hunt, could be my overall decline in fitness, could be all of the above while my partner in crime is out of the country. Could be none of them and my meds decided to stop working, i could go on forever brainstorming reasons why but the point is something just feels…off. And i don’t think the cause of the unrest is all that important, because I’m not alone in this feeling. It’s common to all humanity. What is important right now is using tools I’ve gathered through recovery and putting them to use against the feeling. Being able to survive, strive, and thrive in the midst of generic discomfort is the key to success in this chaotic existence. 

I’m constantly amazed by the lengths people will go to for one another, putting themselves all the way out for friends and family. Five (and in a few days six) folks have flown across the country to help me stand up and walk to the potty. That’s insane, but hey that’s also family. Im becoming a huge fan of the wholesome sector of internet content and it brings me a nice warm feeling. Allows me to believe that there isn’t an overwhelming amount of negativity in the world. If you do nothing today, at least go do something positive on social media today. Like a post, comment on your homie’s selfie, hold the door open for someone and smile. But not like the crazy smile…like the movie smile…did yall see that one? That one was creepy as shit.

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5a8SwDX6DQM8RG6jZv9bFV?si=d_KwhpLcSeWoW2tTOOzbDA

NFCWFH / IGY6 / 988 / SCW / 562


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

S2 Bonus: ACL recovery

Image
It’s funny how this whole blog project started as an accountability thread for getting back in shape, which then mutated into a weekly log of my mental health recovery journey. Ups, downs, victories, and set backs run through this last year and a half and it leads to the understanding i can withstand just about anything. Then i tore my ACL. Now im stuck on the couch and my house will be a revolving door of family and friends helping me out over the next few weeks. All of that said, the first couple of days are gonna be intriguing to say the least so i figured I’d start this thread as a day by day check-in. It won’t be separate posts for each day, just additions to this entry so check back! Day 0: surgery and hell I was up at 4 for a 5:30am check-in time. Put on my cleanest cut-off shorts and lifting shirt and was ready to fuck this thing. I only really started panicking once they made me change and hooked me up to all the shit…but by then it’s like when they lock the rollercoaster bar ...
Read more

S2 E21: the end and beginning

Image
 Welp, it happened. Whole ass officially happened. Last Friday I took my uniform off for the the last time, snagged some stickers and a flag on the way out, and medically retired from the United States Army. Yeah, the target since fall semester of 2009 and the job that has defined my identity has all come to an end. Lemme pull this side thread for a minute because tackling how I’m feeling in its entirety is seemingly impossible right now. So Friday i pierced my nose, rather I went to my tattoo shop and paid a professional to stab me in the nostril and fill the hole with a cute little shiny stud. Coming from a blood line with already big noses, the swelling I’ve had since Friday makes me feel like inoki from Shippuden which is just excessive. Can’t wait for the next six months to fly by so i can swap out the stud for a ring but in the meantime its all saline solution and not laying on my face. It’s hard to put into words how im feeling. On the one hand this event has been on the hor...
Read more

S2 E52: Respite

Image
 Damn, alright folks shake it out and off and away. What a fuckin year huh? Sorry it’s been a few weeks, it’s been pretty rough and tumble the back half of December to cap off an already chaotic year. Let’s get in to it. So the last entry dropped a week out from NYE. Christmas Eve i worked with my buddy then went home and spent some quality time with the dogs. Christmas Day was spent being disappointed in stranger things volume 2 and playing Xbox all day. The last week was just slugging through it at work before taking off for NYE in Ohio. Nothing much to talk about, just lifting and rolling and eating. After i realized i was doing the inbody scan every other day and letting the numbers hurt my feelings, i stopped fucking doing that 🤣. Be real with yourself about expectations and realities kids. The conundrum of my diet persists and so do I. Ohio was awesome, as always. We hit the Cinci zoo for the lights festival (Kyle, Kris, an absolute pleasure as always). Gotta pay respects to...
Read more