Road to Right: Justin’s accountability tour

It’s come up a few times in this project but its inception wasn’t exactly as open and honest as it appeared. I did in fact start the weekly check-ins as a method of accountability because I had found myself in a real shit place in life, but i wasn’t being truthful. The first three entries were either exaggerating the good parts or simply all out bullshit. Whether i was trying to convince myself or someone else is still up for debate, it hard to say. But this was the real breaking point. This was when the bending and bending and bending finally snapped. This was the ultimate low point that would end up being dual purposed as the starting point for the life I’m living now. This was a rebirth. And for such an important and pivotal day in my short history, it’s kinda been surrounded by a sense of melancholy. Maybe it’s the snow or bad sleep, but looking at all of the work that has come and gone in a year and understanding how much there is still to go is daunting…kinda scary…and creates th...

If you read the whole year last year you know that not all weeks are winners with intense metaphysical thought nuggets to help the masses deal with trauma and mental anguish. No some weeks are just weeks, a series of seven wake ups and bed times that you get through to get to ‘nother ones. That’s last week for ya. Outside of video games, lifting, and gumbo i didn’t do/learn/experience shit outside of the usual. That’s fine in the grand scheme of things. Hell, a nothing sandwich week is 1000x better than a shit week which is kinda what today is starting off as. Let’s see, oh there was one day that i had to parent myself to get off the couch and go to BJJ. That’s a new experience, i mean i truly didn’t want to shit that day besides scroll hole but i forced my sedentary ass to change and go. And i enjoyed it all the same that I normally do. Is it weird having an internal crisis play out as an external conversation? Sure dude yeah…but like i was alone all week so why not, dogs can’t ju...

I’ve seen this posted on instagram and facebook all the time where it describes guy friendships: how they can go years without so much as a text but then pickup exactly where they left off face to face. That’s kinda the theme of last week. Went skiing with my homie after finishing my leg sleeve tattoo (terrible idea) and parlaying directly into the Denver stock show with him and some friends on Saturday. There’s some magic in adult male friendships, maybe it’s because i spend all of my time cooped in the house or working out but that shit needs to be more common this year. And for the skiers out there look: i only learned right before covid hit in 2020 and im not good, so when i say we skied lift to lift for a total of 8 runs and i was dying don’t make fun of me. I’m old and hurt. Fuck man last week was solid, probably because work didn’t really need me so all i had to do was focus on me and the house and some time with Liz before she headed off to Ohio again. She’ll get back next week...

I mean How messed up would it be if I just left it off there? I mean things are really fuckin moving right now! Three weeks from a year of sobriety, two weeks from the Deadcember payoff, within a month and change of the big Green to Blue transition, all the while having my head on right for the first time in a while? Killing the series now is like Netflix running bomb ass new shows for exactly one season then never touching them again (fuck you Netflix give me more Jupiters Legacy or Kaos…or both for that matter). Yeah i think it would be a disservice to the 10-12 people who keep up with this. Plus, the ability to look back at tough times and track my own resilience and measure the effectiveness of different coping strategies is incredibly beneficial to my own growth and development. Also, it costs free 99 and keeps me honest so fuck it, we ball. Damn, alright so where were we? Oh yeah, we do last week on the following Monday. K, so last week we had new years, routine assumption, statu...

 And just like that it is 2025. 52 weeks of trial and error, change and strife, crying, laughing, bullshit, and fun. On the whole I’d say i did a fairly decent job keeping up with this project, i missed two-ish weeks that got covered in joint posts but overall a full year in review. That was kinda cool. So far I’ve gone back and reread the first half of 2024 entries and holy shit…gotta say that was eye opening. I had forgotten how shitty I was feeling and how hard every damn day was to walk the straight and narrow. I’ve forgotten the struggle to do basic personal care (eating, sleeping, gym, etc). So in hindsight, hey buddy you made it.  The tone from last year was, on the whole, starting from ground zero and building a strong foundation upon which to build some shelter from the rain. I think at this point I can assuredly say I did that. No i didn’t get better at guitar or run a half marathon, but i picked up a new hobby and set and met goals throughout the year. Did the army ...